Wednesday, 5 August 2009

The rocky boat of marriage

And as an avid TV watcher, one of my most favourite channels is E! Yes, like any normal woman in the world, I love to hear news of other people, err, celebrities I mean. And now that I have my own family the newest story that grabs my attention is the Gosselin family split-up. In case you don't know, the Gosselin family is the well-known family of the reality show "John and Kate plus 8." Yes, a family with EIGHT children: a pair of twins and a group of sextuplets. And you think you have such a huge responsibility hah? He he.

Anyway, the shows is about how the couple, Jon and Kate, that are trying to cope with issues of raising eight children. From the shouting, the travelling, the potty training to making new rooms for the kids. Kate shouted a lot to both Jon and the children especially during the last few episodes, but I guess that's what people do when they have to raise eight individuals in similar ages. Jon however cannot cope with the pressure of both his marriage and the family's TV show so he ended up having several so-called 'affairs'. I even found a picture of him with a young lady … and he's wearing earrings! Again, from the TV, I found out that Kate also did some 'naughty' stuff. She has a bodyguard (what for? I dunno) and the media portrayed her as a very bossy person which is why the family has so many 'ex nannies'. But I have no right to judge them. Life must be hard for them and I can tell from the show that they did everything they could for the children. I was just upset to hear about the splitting up and apparently the divorce.

What I learn from this kind of situation is that, at some point your 'boat of marriage' would hit rock bottom, storm or even tidal waves. Some of use survive, some don't. I have some friends who had been through such times and eventually split-up. There is this couple that split up because of financial problem. Another, because there are too many people involved in the marriage: the husband, the wife and the lover. I even found a marriage that ended because the 3rdperson instead of a lover is …. The mother in law.

Sometimes I wonder, is there such a mantra for having a harmonious family? I always say tolerance, but I guess patience is also a key. Before we got married it feels like eternity to wait for a call from our then-boyfriend. But after the lavish wedding party, we have to deal with not only the kissing and cuddling, but also with our spouse's bad breath, his habit of leaving the toilet seat up or the all too-spicy food. For me in the end, there's no perfect plan to split-proof our marriage. What we can do is to make sure that when the hard time comes, we have to put our common sense in our heads and work from there.

And oh, I guess having a dinner for two in the weekends also works. *wink-wink*

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